~ JVC ~

i wake up in the morin notice somethin aint right, coz although the sun is shinin there is no light, i open my curtain wipe the sleep from my eyes to tired to realise ive lost my sight, blindin from my ignorance i prepare myself for the day, thinkin this sinkin feelin will go away as i set off on my track the little voice in my head says turn back, but when go i to turn back its to late darkness surrounds me drowin me in sorrow, coz i no today i will be no differnt from tomorrow, hope is quikly faidin soon ill be too far gone for savin my soal will go and leave my body hollow and still in the face adversity i search for an inner strength try and stand firm with both fist clenched, but i crnt find my heart, its like the fuckin things deserted me it used to be there this makes no sense, so i pray to a god that im not even sure i belive in, to help me in my hour of need and heep mne breathin i pray to this god that created a place called eden a parardise to put adam and eve in, but i dont think he hears me speakin, im startin to weaken now im reachin for whats fake poisonin my body to escape, suddenly im overwhelmed with optimism my shoulders no longer feel the weight yeah life feels great but its fake.

its fake coz i no the smile on my face is only there coz im to intoxicated to care, that inside my soal i cant find no hope just a gapin whole where it used to be there, an amendable tear,that when im sober hurts more than i can bare it just aint fair, and soon ill be back in normality and when the posion wears off and my whole bodys achin from the pain of reality, the pain of reality starts to grab me live is a fallacy and im starin straight at death as it tries takin another stab at me, im down on my knees, and im beggin,someone hear me please answer my questions, why is my life just one big deep depression, is this gods way of teachin me a lesson, forgive me farther for i have sinned, this is my confession, i do bad things and i dont no why i do them, i try to do good deeds but people see right through them, i crnt get close to no one, coz they wont let me, how can i feel accepted, if they dont respect me, is this my heart? i feel startin to sink as the more i talk im startin to think that maybe i feel this way because of the mistakes ive made and it aint got shit to do with no one else i can only blame myself, its me whos bad for my health, and only i can rectify what is wrong in my life if only i tried a little bit harder, it all comes down to a choice what would i rather, stay how i am and watch the days get darker or forgive myself, get on with life and not look back after.