~ villopoto ~

i wish someone would shoot me in the head, why is this world so shit, and why is plain life so fucked up, everything you do you can pick a fault with, some faults like to push themselves up to the surface like air bubbles in the sea. you wish you could just pop them tho but its seems to me that these ones in my speical little life have a nice hard metal coating, i think i have been searching for a can opener to open them for longer than a few days and im starting to get fustrated with it, im happy i have something that im intrested in to do to try and get my mind off things tho, it seems to help, but not enough, i dont understand how people can say being busy stops you thinking about things, its doesnt, infact, it makes it worse, you just think about it that bit more while your doing it, so what am i going on about?
why do people make exuses? ... can you emagin yourself being in something total safe? something that you no is totally harmless? no matter how much i think i am with things i no im not. to put it totally straight on flat on the table in biiiig red captial lettters, i am insucure about things. but i supose isnt everyone about something, its always a certain topic and normaly becuase of something that has happened it stays with you and no matter what things make you feel like now and again when it feels like the situation could be getting to where it was or remotly similar, but im the type that needs the reasurance, the one that sorta needs that bit ov a pat on the back to say luk yeh dont worry about it, its not what you think, or yeh i understand what you mean.
i think its a certain type of person to be able to compremise, not alot ov people can do it well, or at all, becuase some are to selfish to think about someone else, all the think about is themselves what they get out ov it, then the next person comes after, its not the way life should really be, you need to look out for number 1, but you need to think about what the fuck your doing at the same time, like the things you do, even small stupid things, if someone else did them to you, would you be to chuffed? ... i dont think many people would for somethings. even still its really hard for people to think about what they have done without the big fat self centred heads getting in the way, they dont think about someone else.... they think about themselves, if you thought about every single thing you said and did in 1 day, i dont think you would say half the things you say.