~ paper box ~

im sick of the image that people need to be thin, the way the perception of someone is judged on the way they look, if your thin and you have big tits, your in, men all want you and every single man attatched or un attatched all want to ' shag ' you. they all perv at you and every woman can see what there mind is thinking, they have this look on there face that sort of says words, like them scroll screens. then people wonder why woman are so obsesed about themselves, why people go to great lengths for things and i think it all comes down to it, no one wants a fat person, when a skinny blonde bimbo walks past in her tight jeans and her tits hanging out her top, its what men want isnt it?.
its been one of my biggest hang ups ever, i hate weight and i hate how some people are totally judged by it, have being skinny, to normal to fat, and relises that at all weights there has been a downside. men dont get judged like woman, for a man to put weight on half the time makes them look more manly, but if a woman puts an itch of weight on, thats it, comments come here there and everywhere, it fucks me off so much. my confidence about stuff like that is so far down it bought itself a spade to dig itself lower if needs be, i feel like at times when you see a skinny pretty person i wanna cut the stomachs up and then slash my legs open and then give them all my fat.
its the way men get such an easy ride, woman dont perv at men the way men look at woman, its asthough a comparision is made with everyone that walks past, and if there worth it, a gud stare is in order, even when there with someone, a glare or some obvious jester is thrown in to make you realise what such a fat cow you actully are, and how nice it would be for them to fuck them sensless, where as woman just dont give much of a fuck if a stripper walked down the street swinging there 10 inch cock around. men can get fat and look gud, were as fat woman ... a no go.
i no 100% that just about 99% of the woman population think the same, thats why there is make up, thats why woman have different clothes to men. because your no good as you are, and you need things to make you look better even remotely look a bit better.
at the same time as being angry about that, i wanna go and cut my dad up into little peices and i dont actully think it will be long until some blood shed starts with all this, the petty coments are really pissing me off now, the sound of his voice is now irrotating me so much i want to scream.
its like everyone is being told to be shitty, being told to give me crappy answers when there is actully no need for it, i mean come on , please if you have a fucking problem with me just fucking say it, why b shitty with me if i have done fuck all? no excuse?.
i wish people were straight with you, i wish they said things they want to say without holding things back, .... i wish you could say anything you wanted without getting a mouthful back from things, i wish people where fuckin happy, why is life so hard, they make it hard for themselves, they make it worse for themselves in huffs, i think the worlds such a shit place because no one can see the good side of things, no one can see what good things can come out of something, instead they wake up in a shitty mood and keep it going all day, i think they injoy it more than anything, i think they love it, infact they do, ive decided.